I caught a podcast on RightNow Media in the morning while on the way to the office. It was a discussion involving Tim Keller and two married couples (one Christian and one non-Christian). I thought to distill some of the insights that I heard in this post.
We ought to serve each other in our marriage
Service in marriage has two objectives – character change and community building. Marriage is not for the sake of taking only or about pleasing ourselves. Marriage is about serving each other. As we do so, we will see changes in our character and we will be building a community (for our family, our children, and even the people around us).
Marriage serves as a picture of the relationship between Christ and the church. It is the picture of the gospel.
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies.
– Ephesians 5:25-28
This is the classic paragraph on the role of husband. Just as how Christ saved and continually sanctify the church, the husband should do the same. The picture of salvation is the unconditional love and acceptance that the husband ought to give the wife. The ongoing sanctification is the picture of the ongoing preparation that the husband ought to do for the wife.
Christ did not accept the church after it is found without spot or wrinkle, without sin or blemish; instead, Christ took an active role in preparing and presenting the church in splendor, without spot or wrinkle, without sin or blemish.
In the same way, husbands ought to help our wives become beautiful, glorious, and holy. We don’t accept them because they are beautiful, glorious, and holy, rather, we support and serve them in preparing them to be beautiful, glorious, and holy.
God is in our marriage
I thought it was really fascinating to have a non-Christian couple on the show. As they heard the discussion and shared their own thoughts, I really appreciated the honesty and honour demonstrated during that conversation. In an increasingly fragmented world, where people can no longer accept differing viewpoints, it’s refreshing to hear healthy, honest, and honouring conversations.
There was something encouraging that the couple said after hearing all the various points given by the rest of the speakers – “it’s nice to know that God is on your side.” Indeed, as Christian couples, we can stand in the knowledge that God is in our marriage and also that His grace will see us through all the hard and challenging times.
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